Update, Weather Report, Joke

Woah! What a packed month this has been already. Besides having playoff baseball becoming a detriment to my academic life, I've begun to realize that the last week of this month will be the busiest and most stressful of grad school to date. Yikes.

But yeah, classes are going good and tough, I have tests this week and next, with papers due the end of the month. I think I know what I'm doing for Thanksgiving break, but we'll see what happens. I was able to have dinner with a couple friends from home; authentic Italian pizza joined with authentic Christian fellowship and community. Now that's a recipe I can star.

One of my theology textbooks I've been reading this weekend posed the question, "What if Jesus had died of a heart attack in the Garden of Gethsemane and the disciples then laid him in the tomb? Would there still have been the resurrection? And assuming that he would have been raised from the dead, would there have been atonement? Could we still say that he died for our sins?" (The Soul of Ministry, Anderson, paraphrased). These questions were posed by the author to his graduate level theology class. If I were in that class, I think I would have responded that absolutely, there would be a resurrection. Without God bringing God's self (in the form of Jesus) back to (human) life, what would Jesus have been? Simply a prophet or healer, a chosen one at best. But no, with Jesus being the Son of God, being one with the Father God, the resurrection was a necessity; it still is the necessity. As for the atonement of our sins, Jesus' death can still be seen as the result of human frailty, whether on the cross or gripping his chest. The Cross is the more powerful image, with Jesus' death being the direct result of human frailty of mind, will, and body. However, the heart attack scenario is simply due to the frailty of human body. It lacks the power, the responsibility (perhaps one could go so far to say, it lacks the guilt) of the crucifixion. But again we are reminded, as the author's students reminded him and the class, Jesus' death is important insofar as God Incarnate died a human death, but the salvific part of the story, the real essence of the crucifixion, is in the resurrection. The student mentioned above said this: "It was the resurrection that counted, anyway. Without a resurrection there would be no atonement, even if he died on the cross." The author responded, "Amazing! ... It is the resurrection of Jesus, not just his death on the cross, that completed the atonement. ... The reason for this is that it is not just sin that needs to be forgiven, but death that needs to be overcome." Interesting, to be sure. How it relates to ministry with youth, well, we'll see about that in class discussion tomorrow.

In other news, it snowed this weekend. Just a light dusting Saturday morning, but enough to make it really cold. However, it was not enough to force me to abandon my weekly frisbee game. So I bundled up and trudged down to the field for what I dubbed "Ultimate Freezebee". It was a good fun (and yes, very cold) time; all in all, well worth it.

And a joke I'm stealing from a friend of mine in Colorado (where she got it, I have no clue):

What do you get when you divide the circumference of a Jack o Lantern by its diameter???

PUMPKIN PI!!!

With that in mind, have a good week. Stay warm, stay safe, and stay with the knowledge that it is in the resurrection that God and Christ defeated death to assure Christ's followers their place with God for eternity.

Peace.

a bad day full of blessings...

Yesterday was not a good day for me academically. One of my professors forgot my name during precept time (essentially small study group), going through the roster until he had to start going through it again before he recognized my face on the pictures he had printed out. I got my first real grad school paper back and was not pleased with the grade I received. In another class we watched a few clips from a movie that were quite upsetting and made me wonder what I would/will do when confronted with youth that are lost, angry, hating, violent, unsure, lonely. How can I share the grace and love of God with kids like that? Though, a few of my classmates seem to be a little jealous of me because I have a church youth group to work with and they are not drawing much interest from other churches in the area, so that makes me feel a little guilty about talking about how great the kids I get to work with are (especially since some of my friends in that class interview at the same church...). All in all, a tough day in the classroom.

On the flip side, one of the upper classmen invited me to play ultimate frisbee with him (usually we just end up on the field around the same time, but it's nice to get an invitation nevertheless). Another upper classman in dorm found out I'm a Star Trek fan and we had a pretty lengthy conversation about the continuity of the films and tv serieses (is that the plural of series? Or is series the plural of series? One series, two series, red series, blue series?). Then he loaned my three seasons of one of the shows (Enterprise) and a "Best Of" fan collector's DVD. To cap the day, I was walking a friend to her car after she finished work last night, and one of the catering staff members handed me a bag of cookies that had be left over from an event earlier in the day. Because they had been on plates all day, they couldn't be sold, but they're still good to eat. So I brought them back to share in my dorm. After all, who can say no to free cookies at 9:00pm?

It's the next morning and I'm still wiped from yesterday. I'm reading the story of Isaac and Jacob, and Walter Brueggemann, one of the commentors we use, is saying that when God calls someone somewhere to do something, God doesn't make it easy or fun or without pain or conflict. Jacob recieved his father's blessing, his brother's birthright, and the girl of his dreams, but none of it was easy and none of it was without conflict or fear. I know I have my parents' blessing, I don't have a brother to steal from (though my sister does have some great cookbooks that would look nice on my shelf...), and if I've found the girl of my dreams, well, it's just not the time right now. So me and Abraham, me and Jacob, we've been called somewhere to do something(s) and we've been given promises and blessings from God, but it ain't gonna be easy. It hasn't been easy. Being a Christian will forever be hard and full of conflict and pain. Following Christ is not the easy choice.

Yup. Take care. Bye.

Kendall, meet Abraham. Abraham, Kendall.

I'm taking an Old Testament class on the Pentateuch, as I've mentioned before. So far, in the three weeks I've been in class, we've gotten a general outline of this part of Scripture, talked about the creation narratives, and briefly discussed Adam and Eve, Cain and Abel, and Noah. Now we're getting into the stories surrounding Abram and Sarai.

One of the common themes when talking about these two characters is trust issues with God. God promises to Abraham that he and Sarah will have a child, and that Abraham's decendents will be numerous and prosperous. However, as these two continue to wander and grow old together, their trust in God is challenged and threatened. God's promises, though, can and should always be trusted, as difficult as that may be. Sarah, Abraham, and Isaac all felt the strain of the seemingly forgotten promises of God, and the stretched trust that they placed in their God. But God holds to God's covenants and promises, especially when it comes down to the wire and it becomes a kind of all-or-nothing situation.

In the almost month I've been here, I've had a rollercoaster time of trust with God. Before coming out here, I felt a deep drawing of myself to the Midwest. Ad my send-off really solidified that feeling when I was getting scared, anxious, and uncertain. Now as I begin working at a new church with new groups of youth, I worry that I won't be able to do my position as youth leader justice. Youth leaders must teach, encourage, challenge, support, discipline, outrage, provide, and guide youth in their complex, fluid, terrifying walk(s) with God. Am I really cut out for all of this? I know I can play games, read scripture, tell stories, and relate to youth, but can I really minister to them?

Like Abraham, I've been given a promise that God will bless me and the ministry I do for God. Christ promises to be with me, to reach down and lift me up in my darkest, deepest pits of dispair and distrust. The Holy Spirit promises to guide me, provide wisdom and discernment, and give me peace, patience, and joy to work with kids. And, again like Abraham, I feel tested and challenged over and over again. I don't want to fail my God and my supporters, but I know I can't do God's ministry on my own. My ministry is not worth beans (or corn, in this part of the country).

My ministry must be God's minsitry. My lessons must be Christ's Gospel. My joy must come from the Spirit. I won't be able to do any of this by myself. But handing the reigns to God is the most difficult part of my faith. I have theological knowledge, Biblical history, and program planning, but I know there's more. It's that more that I have trouble with. I trust it when things are going well, but will I be able to trust it when it comes down to my time to sacrifice my Isaac?

I hope and pray that all will be well, in my successes and failures. I know it'll be fine, but I want it to be great.

God, help me get over myself, my experiences, and my pride and just let you do your thing. Here's to you and not to me. Amen.

I'm excited to work with the kids here in MN, and I'm terrified of them at the same time. It might be a healthy fear, but it's a fear just the same. And yes, it's exactly what I signed up for when I came here, to be terrified, broken down and built back up. It'll all buff out.

Peace, patience, and joy.

Combo Update and Theological Pondering

It's been a hectic and busy couple weeks. I'm still trying to figure out my sleep/eat/read/class/lab/worship/study/writing schedule. But it's getting there.

I'm going to a Twins game today with a friend from church back home. I'm excited!

In my Old Testament Pentateuch class, looking at the first five books of the Old Testament, we were talking about the creation narrative found in Genesis 2-3. In speaking of the serpent, one of the articles we read said that the serpent was the first piece of creation to use theology. By that, it meant that the serpent was the first to talk about God, rather than talk to God. The serpent talks about God, bending and cunningly changing God's words to create new meaning out of them, in this case, meaning that Adam and Eve should eat the fruit from the forbidden tree. But that's theology, in a sense, isn't it?

Theology talks about God, Christ, the Holy Spirit, the Divine, and the Sacred. Theology explores the words and phrases of the Bible and other documents and texts in order to find some new meaning or understanding. However, one of the dangers of doing theology is that we theologians get caught up in what the serpent was doing: talking about God and not talking to or with God. And now, for me, studying at Seminary, taking graduate level classes, trying to figure out what ministry is, looking at theology in both Testaments, exploring what worship is about and where it comes from, and trying to gain more experience in youth ministry, all of these things are inherently theological. On the surface they talk about God, what God would have human beings do for God's purposes, and how do we as humans interact with God. Here at my school they make a conscious effort to temper theology and the study of Christianity with worship and praise and prayer. I've never been in an academic setting where my professor of the Old Testament opens each class in prayer, "in the name of Jesus Christ." I can go into my professors offices and ask for them to pray for me in my discernment in finding out God's plans and will for my life, here and now in Minnesota, as well as the future ministry I am called to do. It is a new and strange shift for me as a student. As a Christian, it is encouraging that I can pray with so many leaders and teachers of the faith. It's an odd feeling, but a welcome one.

Peace and grace be with you, through Jesus Christ, our Lord. Amen.

Oh, and have a good day!

Couple of Theological Thoughts

One funny (to me) and one super interesting.

1) I had my first class today, an Old Testament class on the Pentateuch (aka the Torah or Genesis through Deuteronomy). We opened the class in prayer in which my professor concluded with, "In Jesus' name." I think this is funny because here we are, learning about a part of scripture in which Jesus the Christ has yet to be realized. However, it's also important to keep in mind, because as a Christian, I real these books of scripture through the lens of the redeeming Son of God. It's an interesting thought and reminder of my own biases (not necessarily bad ones) that I bring to the study of faith and the scriptures.

2) In my readings for my next class (tomorrow morning), a Systematic Theology class overviewing Christian Teachings. As part of our reading, we read a chapter entitled "Confessing Jesus Christ in Context" by Migliore. In this chapter, the author speaks to the fact that again, as we study religion, we come from different places and contexts to study theologies from different places and contexts. This chapter overviews different theological contexts, including Latin American, African American, Asian (mostly Korean) American, and Feminist contexts in their theologies.

The interesting point I wish to share (though there are many) comes from a Korean American theologian A.S. Park. He offers another layer to the idea of sin. While most people, myself included, first think of sin as an action (or inaction) taken on the part of some perpetrator. For example, I do something that harms my relationship with a friend and therefore my relationship with Christ. In this case, I am the perpetrator and the sinner. Park agrees with this but takes it further. Rather than the only sinner in this situation being the perpetrator who requires forgiveness and redemption, the sin also falls on the victim. The victim becomes enslaved by anger and resentment and requires liberation from oppression. I never really thought about my displeasure or anger at another's sin needing liberation for myself.

However, the more I reflect on it, the more I wonder if that is how one is able to forgive his/her neighbor when their neighbor sins. "Forgive us our sins as we forgive those who sin against us." This line from the Lord's prayer strikes me as particularly relevant in this discussion. I've heard in the past that if one is to be forgiven and cleansed by Christ's gift of redemption, one must be able and willing to forgive themselves. Using Park's idea, I see that both the perpetrator and the victim of the sin must forgive themselves before being able to forgive the sin completely. If I am the victim of another's sin, I must allow Christ to take that sin of oppression from me; only then am I able to forgive the other, thereby helping them to release their sin into the arms of Christ.

Woah. Only one day and I'm thinking of the redemptive power of Christ and how that affects my/our mortal, temporal relationships. This might be a long semester...

The Minnesota State Get-Together!

Today I attended the Minnesota State Fair with a friend of mine from school back home, her twin sister, and their mom (and later, dad). I arrived at the fairgrounds at 8:30am (the grounds opened at 6) after finding my way to a free shuttle so I wouldn't have to park at the fair. An hour later I met up with my friends, and our adventure began!

I started my fair experience culinarily, of course! I had a fried egg and bacon sandwich; deliciously simple. After breakfast we went to a llama judging, where youngsters showed their llamas. It was interesting...and Minnesotan! After the llamas we wandered over to the swine barn, where we saw the pigs and sheep that were being shown, as well as the state's largest boar: four years old and 1,310lbs! From there we followed the line of barns and saw the cows; bummer, we just missed the milking! As we were walking out of the cow barn, a HUGE cow was walked past us. I tried to snap a photo, but couldn't quite get it. But trust me, it was HUGE!

Next was the Mircale Birth Center, where, if you you're lucky, you can witness a farm animal giving birth! Right there! Veternarians were on stand-by. But again, nothing was being birthed while we were there. Darn...? Next up was the Diary Barn! I had been ordered (note: not just encouraged or recommended, but strictly ordered) to get ice cream while were there; I did. My host treated me to a caramel apple malt, with real apple chunks and caramel on top of the ice cream. It was good, but a little too sticky when I dripped some caramel and ice cream over the edge of the cup. Also in the dairy barn was the butter sculptures. I'm not even kidding. The winners of a kind of beauty contest among young ladies from dairy families had their likenesses carved into butter. They sat in a chilled room (around 40 degrees) for 6-8 (with breaks). They start with a 90# block of butter. Seriously. No joke. A 90 pound block of butter. Then, after the fair is over, the winners take their butter heads home to do with what they please (Imagine Sunday morning over pancakes, "Dad, can you please pass the butter? I'd like the nose please. Or the left ear. That'd be about right."). I heard that most donate their butter selves to local clubs or churches who do pancake or lefsa feeds after the fair. Crazy, but Minnesotan!

Next up was the poultry barn where we were able to listen in to the rooster crowing context. They counted how many times each rooster in the round crowed in 5 minutes (or something like that). It was strange. But kind of fun to see all sorts of different roosters, turkeys, chickens, ducks, geese, and ganders. And right next door were the goats. So we walked around looking at them too.

Next we did some window shopping, ending up at the Horticulture center where they had the largest produce of Minnesota on display. My favorite was the zucchini club. Next was the Crop Art, where all the pictures we created out of seeds exclusively from MN. The Obama picture made me laugh, as did the Frank Sinatra and Sherlock Holmes likenesses. Also a part of that exhibit was the scarecrow competition. There were some clever entries, like the shark and the space man.

Another staple of the fair were a smorgesboard of "As Seen on TV" type infomertials, including the Sham-Wow and a nice set of knives. Next were the quilts, including a huge Candy Land game board. Clever and funny. We just walked around for a while after that, seeing the tractors lined up, the Spam store, a Swedish Lutheran Church booth serving breakfast (including egg coffee), and some touristy photo spots.

I was excited for the next stop: lunch! The food bulding, a mecca of the culinary Minnesotan masterpieces, such as: S'mores on a stick, Spaghetti and Meatball dinner on a stick (which I had; messy and awkward, but I've now had spaghetti and meatballs dipped in batter and deep fried), deep fried cheese curds, and Swedish Meatballs on a stick. Crazy fun.

Next was the Barrel Races. It was as close to a rodeo as I've ever been. Those horses can move! They've got a lot of weight to throw around. It was impressive. Also impressive were the performers in the daily parade, including my host's high school marching band. That sure brought back memories. Good times.

Oh. My. Goodness. After the parade we shared something incredible and amazing: a deep fried Snickers bar. No joke. Topped with powdered sugar. The chocolate, caramel, and peanuts were all melty and mixed in the middle, but held in place by the fried batter. Strange but too delicious for my own good. I'm glad I only had a few bites (though I certainly wanted more)!

More walking around and window shopping brought up to Sweet Martha's Cookie Jar, where we purchased a bucket of chocolate chip cookies to share. I still have a third of it left. And you know how much I love cookies. Baked fresh and plopped in buckets. We carried our buckets to the Got Milk? kiosk where we could buy a cup of milk (12oz), either chocolate or plain, for $1. The best part of it, though, is that it's all you can drink, as long as you bring back your cup. Delicious.

More walking and more sight seeing brought us back to the rodeo stadium where we watched a boring show of horses while munching on delicious cookies. After battling the urge to nap, we decided to refill our milk glasses and wander more. After much wandering we made it to the beer gardens, where we enjoyed a chef's salad, fried cheese curds, and Summit Brewery's Pale Ale (a local product, brewed in St Paul). After chatting with the locals and resting in the shade, it was time to find my host's father who was joining us late. He treated me to a corn dog sheathed in mustard, which I enjoyed as we toured another tractor exhibit. My host's dad was feeling overly generous, as he treated me again, along with his daughter, to an ice cream cone. Delicious. Some of the best plain vanilla ice cream I've ever had.

Shortly after, we wandered back to the grandstands, where my hosts had tickets to see Garrison Keeler record his radio program. They were super excited. So as they went to the show, I left and went back to the bus to take me 'home'. Overall, I spent a full 11 hours at the Minnesota State Fair. My research there was delicious and resulted in my stomach being stretched beyond my imagination. But here I am, still munching on a few cookies, debating if I want to go back tomorrow. Below please find a few select photos from my day.

Welcome to September

I went to a Minnesota Twins game today at the Metrodome. The stadium is getting replaced this off-season, so I wanted to be sure to catch a game this season. Hopefully, it won't be my last baseball game of the season. Funny thing though: $8 general admission ticket, 2 $1 hot dogs (only on Wednesdays to the first 20,000 fans), and a $6.50 beer. Something seems a little out of place...

Anywho, great fun at the ballpark with a bunch of Minnesotans. And a Texan and a Floridan. Good times.

This weekend has some fun times planned. I'm going to the Minnesota State Fair on Friday (Deep Fried Twinkie on a Stick!!!) with a friend from school. Might meet up with some more friends Saturday and/or Sunday. Maybe try a different place of worship on Sunday too. I've got to make sure I get some good hearty fun in this weekend, as next week Tuesday classes start.

I think most of the guys on my floor have moved in, though I really don't know for sure. A few of them are pretty nice; I haven't met the rest. I've been quite introverted and fairly reclusive once I get back to my dorm room (I'm exhausted from the day!).

Thought from the baseball game today: What is the relationship between faith and sports? How do some people follow sports with varying shades of worship, including a litergy and praise? Interesting how some fans will follow a sport or a specific team "religiously", i.e. reading articles and scores in the sports page rather than reading scripture or articles about God. This is something I hope to improve upon myself.

I'm still getting used to the schedule and time difference here. I'm getting up a lot earlier than I was back home...

Peace and Joy,

-K.

Just a head's up...

I want to warn you that I'll be using this blog to do a few things:

1) Update those of you who aren't in close proximity to me. I think that's basically everyone who reads this.

2) Keep a record of some of my thoughts, experiences, learnings during my time at seminary.

3) Ask theological questions that may or may not have/need an answer.

Now that we're clear...

First day. Uber busy. Stress headache. Overwhelmed. Pleased I saw people I know that I didn't expect to see here. Made some new friends. Met some amazing staff and faculty. Had dinner. Blogged. Went to bed way too early.

G'night!

Road Trip to the Next Big Adventure

Three days. 1,800 miles. Five states. Three weary travellers in a new and unfamiliar state. One silver car splattered with bugs. Wow.

So now I'm here, moved in to my new 'home' for this academic year. If you want my mailing address, just let me know via email. I'd love to start collecting more postcards and such. And by such I mean cookies. Yes, you know who you are. And by moved in, I mean all my stuff is in my dorm room here in MN. Very few things are actually unpacked, but at least everything is in the room.

To supplement what the room already offers, the parentals and I went to Target and Ikea today. Correction, we went to SUPER Target (even more crowded and insane than normal Target). And we went through IKEA in under 15 minutes, from Dad dropping Mom and I at the door to getting back into the car. And yes, we even made a purchase! A nice carpet to help muffle the tile floors in my room.

Hmm, my neighbor across the hall just walked by in flip-flops and boxer-briefs. Glad someone feels at home...

As near as I can tell, there are four of us living here on the men's floor in this building. I haven't met the other two yet, but I'm sure I will. We've got time.

Okay, it's off to sleep for me. Yet another night in an unfamiliar place and an unfamiliar mattress. But hey, it's 'home' for now.

Miss you. Peace.