Yesterday was not a good day for me academically. One of my professors forgot my name during precept time (essentially small study group), going through the roster until he had to start going through it again before he recognized my face on the pictures he had printed out. I got my first real grad school paper back and was not pleased with the grade I received. In another class we watched a few clips from a movie that were quite upsetting and made me wonder what I would/will do when confronted with youth that are lost, angry, hating, violent, unsure, lonely. How can I share the grace and love of God with kids like that? Though, a few of my classmates seem to be a little jealous of me because I have a church youth group to work with and they are not drawing much interest from other churches in the area, so that makes me feel a little guilty about talking about how great the kids I get to work with are (especially since some of my friends in that class interview at the same church...). All in all, a tough day in the classroom.
On the flip side, one of the upper classmen invited me to play ultimate frisbee with him (usually we just end up on the field around the same time, but it's nice to get an invitation nevertheless). Another upper classman in dorm found out I'm a Star Trek fan and we had a pretty lengthy conversation about the continuity of the films and tv serieses (is that the plural of series? Or is series the plural of series? One series, two series, red series, blue series?). Then he loaned my three seasons of one of the shows (Enterprise) and a "Best Of" fan collector's DVD. To cap the day, I was walking a friend to her car after she finished work last night, and one of the catering staff members handed me a bag of cookies that had be left over from an event earlier in the day. Because they had been on plates all day, they couldn't be sold, but they're still good to eat. So I brought them back to share in my dorm. After all, who can say no to free cookies at 9:00pm?
It's the next morning and I'm still wiped from yesterday. I'm reading the story of Isaac and Jacob, and Walter Brueggemann, one of the commentors we use, is saying that when God calls someone somewhere to do something, God doesn't make it easy or fun or without pain or conflict. Jacob recieved his father's blessing, his brother's birthright, and the girl of his dreams, but none of it was easy and none of it was without conflict or fear. I know I have my parents' blessing, I don't have a brother to steal from (though my sister does have some great cookbooks that would look nice on my shelf...), and if I've found the girl of my dreams, well, it's just not the time right now. So me and Abraham, me and Jacob, we've been called somewhere to do something(s) and we've been given promises and blessings from God, but it ain't gonna be easy. It hasn't been easy. Being a Christian will forever be hard and full of conflict and pain. Following Christ is not the easy choice.
Yup. Take care. Bye.
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